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The Grumpy Grammarian

The power of words is greater than we think.  When we were young, many of us were taught to recite, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names can never hurt me" – but we knew it wasn't true.  Name-calling is a common, relatively nonviolent way of hurting people; the damaging effect of verbal abuse is widely recognized.  On the positive side, we all know the pleasant feeling we get when we are complimented, but the compliment (like the insult) is only words.

When they discuss language, linguists like to point out that "the word is not the thing."  It is merely a symbolic representation of the thing.  Yet nobody can deny that we believe in the power of these symbols to affect reality – prayers and curses, insults and compliments, verbal rituals and magical incantations.  While it is true, in a sense, that "a picture is worth a thousand words," we should never underestimate the influence that words can have.

This reflection underscores the importance not only of what we say but of how we say it, whether we're speaking or writing.  Those otherwise meaningless combinations of squiggles (in written language) or sounds (in spoken language) that we call words reflect much of what other people know about us.  Our words represent who we are and how we think.

The assumptions that other people make about us based on the words we use and how we use them may not be fair or even accurate representations, but people make these assumptions anyway.  An individual who uses faulty grammar – at least the really glaring kind – may be considered extremely stupid, even if that individual is a genius in some nonverbal area.  We may not intend to reach rash conclusions, but when somebody says, "Me and him is going" we do, at at least some level of consciousness, register doubts about the speaker's intelligence.  With the written language, really atrocious spelling may mark someone as "not very bright."  If Uncle Bart sends us a letter or e-mail riddled with glaring spelling mistakes we may begin to wonder whether Uncle Bart is as smart as we thought he was.

Language matters.  That statement may seem simplistic and obvious, but the truth is that we do not often consider how much it does matter.

Consider this example.  We are probably about to hear and see another of the annual series of discussions about whether it is proper to say "Merry Christmas" or to be politically correct and sensitive to the delicate sensitivities of non-Christians and limit our greeting to the more generic "Happy Holidays."  I know what side I'm on, but that is not point.  The point is that words are thought to have sufficient power that we have vigorous debates over which two-word phrase we use to express this annual greeting.  No doubt, many hours of discussion precede a department store's decision about whether its clerks are going to say "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays."  Hey, the sentiment behind the thought is the same; they're only words.

Only words?  Don't underestimate them or belittle their power on the grounds that they are only words, and words are merely symbols (i.e., not the real thing).  The swastika, the skull and crossbones, the cross, and the American flag are "only" symbols, yet they can evoke strong emotions and represent powerful ideas. 

I've heard people ask, "What does it matter how I say or write something as long as my meaning is understood?"  It's intended to be a rhetorical question – an assertion that whether one is grammatical or concise or graceful in the use of words is unimportant as long as one is understood.  Only the thought counts.  There's enough truth to that concept to make it convincing, but it is not the whole truth.  The effect of a verbal symbol reaches far beyond its dictionary definition, as any recipient of a curse or a blessing can testify.

We should, therefore, treat language with care and respect.  We should try to use what is traditionally deemed correct grammar, even if faulty grammar expresses the thought, lest we be considered ignorant of or indifferent to conventions that educated people honor.  Once we have acquired that skill so that it becomes almost automatic, we may go further and creatively tap the considerable power of language.  As poets discovered ages ago, words are not just windows to our thoughts but also, if you will, windows to our souls.