The election is over, so we don't have to elect another president in this century.  We will elect another president in November 2000, and that is still this century, regardless of what Clinton and the press would have us believe.  Don't trust a man who sells you and bridge, and don't listen to people who can't do simple math.  President Clinton may build a bridge to the 21st century, but, regardless of what he thinks, he won't be President when we get there.

The end of the century – and the end of the millennium – is on Dec. 31 of the year 2000; the new century and millennium do not commence until Jan. 1, 2001.  Do the math (or the logic, if you prefer).  The end (not the beginning) of the year 1 A.D. was the end of the first year A.D. (There was no year 0.)  At the end of this year (1996), we will have completed the 1,996 years A.D. That is, the end of the year 1996 represents the end of the 96th year of this century.  Thus, the ends of 1997, 1998, and 1999 represent the ends of the 97th, 98th, and 99th years respectively.  We do not complete 100 years (the century) until the end of the year 2000.

The same logic and math apply to the turn of the millennium (a period of a thousand years, for those of you who have been out of touch).  The new millennium begins with the first split second of the year 2001 and not a split second earlier.

Those who greet the new century, or the new millennium, on New Year's Day of the year 2000 will be a year early.  They will, in fact, be 366 days early, as 2000 is a leap year.  (Not all centenary years are leap years, by the way, even though all are divisible by 4; centenary years – those ending in 00 – are leap years only if divisible by 400, as 2000 is.)  Logic and math, however, will probably not prevail.  No doubt, in December 1999, auto dealers will be hyping your last chance in this century to buy the new Ford Warthog Van, with four-wheel drive and ten gallons to the mile.  The math won't click in until a year later when you'll again have the last chance in the century.  Marketers aren't going to miss this opportunity to capitalize on public ignorance.

Undoubtedly, a similar phenomenon will occur with the various cult kooks who assemble on mountaintops or in caves to observe the end of the world at the turn of the millennium, as predicted by the Great Hairy Krishnut or whatever.  They will do so at the dawning of the year 2000.  (After all, logic is not these folks' strong suit.)  Disappointed that it doesn't happen, they will take comfort in the math and will anticipate cosmic catastrophe again a year later.

Parenthetically, it is worth inserting the cheerful note that Nostradamus predicted a great war in 1999.  If he is right, few of us will be around to observe 2000, and those who are probably won't give a fig what year it is.

Of course, Nostradamus could be wrong, and so could I.  Maybe the media will give enough publicity to the right way to figure this thing out that people will stifle themselves until 2001.  Just putting it on CNN won't do, however.  They'd have to put it on the idiot channels as well and probably write a rap lyric about it ("The [expletive deleted] millennium don't get the gun 'til two oh oh one").

One fact is certain.  Whether the millennium is observed in January 2000, January 2001, or both, when it arrives, millions of people in this pseudo-educated land of ours still won't know how to spell the word millennium.